mad skillz

You should be impressed. 

We're a human totem pole dedicated to the spirit of win, or something equally foolish and dramatic.

From the bottom up: Me, The Pretty One, The Wild One. 

Coming soon: FOUR PEOPLE.

music videos and death

Have you seen Demi Lovato's new music video? It's her new song, Skyscraper. It's a pretty horrible video. Really. Bad. I was most annoyed by the fact that when she sings the line, "I will be rising from the ground like a skyscraper!" no actual skyscraper pops out of the desert floor on which filming is taking place. So lame, right?

The following conversation happened en route to church:

[someone mentions the general atrociousness of the video, which The Smart One has not seen]

The Pretty One: "... Oh yeah. It sucks. And then, at the end, she dies."

[Everyone looks shocked.]

Me: "... No, she doesn't"

The Pretty One: "Yeah. Well. She should have."

Also, this happened today:

The Middle One: "If you could have any one wish, what would you wish for?"

The Funny One: "I would wish... for.... Oh! I would wish for all the trash in the world to magically poof away!"

TMO: "... Why?"

TFO: "So we don't die. Did you know that we bury trash? And it gets in the ground? And in the air? And in the rain? And it could kill us. [Rant about the dangers of garbage continues. He's ten, in case you didn't check the sidebar.]"

carrots, celery, morality, and other fibrous things

The following conversation occurred while The Smart one was helping The Temporary One with his 'how to be a good person' class. They were talking about what you should do if the cashier gives you an extra five dollars in change. Or something. 

Has it ever occurred to anyone else that 'moral fiber' is a weird phrase?

The Smart One (typing as he speaks): "I... would... probably...."

Me: "Keep the money. Cha-ching!"

TSO: "... Because I have no moral fiber."

Me: "Because you're like Wonder Bread, or something."

TSO: "And not a carrot."

Me: "I would probably keep the money because my moral fiber is more reminiscent of a cheeto than celery."

TSO (to The Temporary One): "Can I put that? Can we please say you're more like a cheeto than celery?"

The Temporary One: "Um.. No?"

TSO: "How about, 'I would return the money because my moral fiber is like celery?'" 

TTO: "No."

Me: "OH I KNOW! 'I would return the money because my moral fiber is more similar to the fiber content of those foods consumed by individuals of higher socioeconomic status than those of lower socioeconomic standing."

TSO/Me: "BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Dobby

So we have a pet wallaroo.

Seriously.

He's pretty great. He likes pretzels, belly rubs, ear scratches, our Golden Retriever, and attempting to groom the people he loves, even though the people he loves don't really appreciate that at all, because he has tiny, grabby little Velociraptor hands that don't feel so great when they're trying to rip non-existent bugs off your legs. He also hisses like a cat, but only when he's happy. Two years later, and I still have to remind myself that the hissing is not my clue to back away slowly.

Dobby also comes when called. Consistently. And pretty rapidly. We have a ridiculously large number of pets, and only two other creatures (the dogs! and only two of them!) in our world do that. So we enjoy it. Also, I love Dobby enough to talk to him in the stereotypically doting baby-voice of all pet owners. I already know this - you don't need to point it out.

This is How it Starts

With The Pretty One slowly waking up and becoming semi-coherent after getting her wisdom teeth pulled. A nice sister would have been too busy comforting her to get the camera rolling. I, however, had the camera ready and - about five seconds after the end of this clip - put on a song I knew she would try to sing along to. She did, and it was funny. I taped it. A post for another day?